Archive for November, 2008

Positivity Fridays: What a week.

This week happened? Really?

Because I don’t remember it happening. But the calendar says its Friday, so let’s get started.

Warning: It’s been a crazy week, so this is gonna be long.

Awesome Thing #1: My friend George!

George, as I described earlier this week, is an awesome friend. He totally helped me out this week by getting my work into a super exclusive place that I can’t even talk about on here, because the only way I could get in was if I swore to secrecy.

Yes, my life is that intense. (Not actually.)

Either way, he opened some doors for me that, being 20, I would have probably had to kick down before they let me in. He’s got age and experience and networks on his side that I don’t. But he let me share them this week, and for that I am totally grateful.

Plus, he gave me the world’s most awesome pep talk and afterwards I just felt so much better about life, that I went home and painted for hours. You can’t buy inspiration like that. He helped me overcome my creative dry spell as well, so all in all, he’s just an amazing friend who is suppotive and encouraging and inspiring.

Am I lucky, or am I lucky?

Awesome Thing #2: My creative dry spell is over! Woohoo!

When you go through a creative drought, life is pretty awful. It’s like pulling teeth, every single day. With a spoon.

But now its over and I started several billion pieces this week, some of which I will be posting right here, right now. Oh yeah. I’m totally stoked about these paintings.

works-in-progress-246

Work in progress by Sarah Marie Lacy

Work in progress by Sarah Marie Lacy

Work in progress by Sarah Marie Lacy

Work in progress by Sarah Marie Lacy

Work in progress by Sarah Marie Lacy

Christmas present for a friend by Sarah Marie Lacy

Christmas present for a friend by Sarah Marie Lacy

Ignore the crappiness of these shots but my light sucked today. When they’re finished, I’ll shoot them better.

Awesome Thing #3: We didn’t kill a cat. Trust me. This is a good thing.

Last night was kind of traumatic and really strange.

My mum was giving me a ride over to Jesse’s house, and there we were, going along, minding our own business, when we both looked to the right side of the car and saw a cat about to get completely mowed down by our wheels. (I would have you note right now, the right side means it was the passenger’s side. My side. Which means I made eye contact. It was horrible.)

We own cats. So killing a cat – definitely not cool. Which means that we were both freaking out. My mum slowed down immediately (traffic was slow, thank god) and turned onto a side street. We were both having a conniption, her more than me though, so I had to pretend that I was calm and in control. (Big fat lie.)

I’d looked behind us and couldn’t see the body of the cat on the road, so I looked at my mum, and was like, “Holy shit. I think its stuck under the car.”

And then we both heard meowing.

You cannot even comprehend how fast we got out of that car. We looked underneath, both of us fearing the worst, and we couldn’t see anything. Nothing hanging down, nadda. Which for us meant that it was really stuck under the car somewhere, like up in the engine or something. My mother at this point was hyperventilating and so I called my dad, who was all like, “Well what do you want me to do?” and I was all, “I don’t know, what the fuck do you want me to do? I have a seriously hysterical woman on my hands and a cat potentially stuck in the car. You tell me.”

At this point, a very nice student was walking past, whom my mother stopped and asked if he could help us. Fortunately he lived right there, so he went and got a flashlight so he could look under the car for us. (Whoever you are, dude, I owe you.)

I went off to see if I could find this poor cat’s body, in case it wasn’t stuck under the car. So there I was, walking up and down one of the main streets in the city, staring at the curb of the road, gnawing on my knuckles. Who looked insane? I did!

I couldn’t find it. I was super upset, because that definitely meant that this poor cat was stuck inside our car. But when I got back to where we were parked, the student couldn’t find any sign of it. Not even any blood.

And then my mum and I realized that we’d never heard a thud. We’d both just assumed that because the cat was right there, that we would have had to hit it.

But by some freaking miracle of god, that cat managed to turn around and run away, without injuring a hair on its head.

So for that, I am ridiculously, wonderfully grateful. Still completely freaked out but very, very happy that cats are speedy creatures. Wherever you are, kitty, I hope you’re okay. And I’m sorry that we nearly killed you and probably scared the living crap out of you. Hug.

Awesome thing #4: I drew a life road map!

In the spirit of figuring out what my life’s ambitions are, and assuming that because I’m an artist, maybe drawing it might make things a little bit easier, I decided to draw myself a life map.

It was actually pretty cool, and it showed me all of the things that I do want to do with my life. There’s a lot. And some of them are pretty huge too. I’m not sure if I’m admitting to myself yet that I really want to do all of these things, but they’re out there, which is good.

I was undecided about whether I should post it here or not (like, does anyone even care?) but if you’re interested in seeing it, tell me in the comments or email me and I will post it for you.

Awesome thing #5: I had an epiphany.

About which I’m not going to go into extreme detail here. Suffice it to say, I know what my block is between me and my ambition, and it was a memory that I tried to bury, but I wasn’t doing a very good job.

When I was 16, someone who is very close to me and whose opinion is important to me, told me, during a bad bout of depression, that I would never accomplish anything great in life because I was sick. That same year, they also told me that I was a very nasty person and that I wasn’t a fighter.

How much do you wanna bet that those words are what’s holding me back now? I’d bet my left kidney on it.

Awesome thing #6: The CFS Ninja is now up and running. Yeeee. Go check it out (but only if you have CFS, ME, or FMS. Because otherwise, it’ll pretty much mean nothing to you.)

http://thecfsninja.wordpress.com/

So it was a week of big, crazy stuff for me. I’m almost a little bit wiped out by it all. Think I might go shopping with one of my friends this afternoon, relax and unwind a little bit.

Hope you all have a fantastic weekend and I’ll see you next week!

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November 28, 2008 at 12:24 pm Leave a comment

Learning to be me, one day at a time.

I talked about money issues the other day. In my attempt to resolve them, I decided to borrow some money books from the library. Turns out they really got me thinking about my journey the past year and so I thought I’d share my thoughts with you here.

Desire

So you know how I said the other day that I felt like there was this disconnect between me and my ambition? And the lovely Kate mentioned the Artist’s Way, and that fear is often the thing that blocks us, and I thought, yep, she’s right on.

So I sat and had a conversation with that fear this morning. And I think I’ve come to some sort of conclusion – the life that I want to create, the things that I want to accomplish and the goals that I am passionate about are huge. And that scares the bejeezers out of me, because I feel like, who am I to want to create this totally awesome life? Who am I to think that I could even do any of this stuff?

Two years ago though, I did think I could accomplish all of these things. I felt like I was walking a path. Which brings me to something that I don’t often talk about, but I’ve decided that I’m going to today.

Faith

I don’t often talk about faith, or spirituality, I think because mine is very personal, and doesn’t quite fit in with the rest of my family’s. (Father and sister are fairly atheist, my mother was raised a strict Christian.)

For me, the Artist’s Way strongly influenced my ideas about a higher power and intuition, I think because they really resonated with me. So let’s just say I believe in a conscious universe.

Two years ago, I really felt like I was walking a path with my art and with helping people with CFS. Even a year ago, when I had my first solo show, I still felt like I was going in the right direction, like my heart was being pulled along by a small, still voice. I knew little about business or marketing or anything like that, but I was hopeful and ready to try anything.

But then I started learning about the business side of art, and became completely confused. Suddenly, I needed a business plan, and goals and a marketing plan and a USP and ads and branding and an image and story.

Wait, I’m a corporation?

I was completely thrown off, but thought that this was what I needed to really be successful, to truly make a living. I needed to create this whole other thing, this thing where my personality was hidden and I was this faceless, corporate entity. That was how you made money.

So I buried my personality, and went to work being a corporation. Do you know how much money I made after that? Well let’s see…

Pre-Corporation (Oct. 1st-Dec. 21st, 2007) – $1250.00

Post-Corporation (Dec. 22nd, 2007 – Nov. 27th, 2008) – $539.00

Yep. I made twice as much in 6 weeks last year than I did in 11 months this year.

And I’m not trying to lay any blame – I don’t think that I was corrupted by the marketers and business people of the world. I just think that I inherently misunderstood what they were trying to show me. One person at the very beginning explained it to me wrong and I was led to understand that your personality had nothing to do with business and it was all about charts and psychology and manipulating people to buy because your marketing messages play on their fear or happiness.

Which I now know is wrong. But all that marketing and business stuff I learned? Totally still important and vital and awesome.

But what’s really important here is that I’ve noticed this happened. And it also means that I can change it.

So I’m going to start injecting my personality back into my business and my website. I’m no longer going to worry about the psychology of my business, or my marketing messages or my “story.”

I’m going to let myself be me. Which, by the way, is completely and totally terrifying. Because for some reason I think that all of my customers are GM employees with no sense of humour or spirituality and everyone is going to just think I’m a quack, and no one will ever again buy a painting from me.

And you know what else I’m going to do? I’m going to let a little faith come back into it. I’m going to start listening to myself again, and see if I can’t start feeling like I’m back on that path. I’m a little lost in the woods right now, but I’m pretty sure I can find it again.

And I don’t regret losing it – I feel like I needed to go through it to really get how important the “Me” factor is in my business. I learned that trusting myself and my own instincts are my best bet for success.

Oh, and the fact that I’ll be ten million times happier.

November 27, 2008 at 12:14 pm Leave a comment

The drought is over. Finally.

For the past few months I’ve had a creative dry spell. If you’re an artist, you know what I’m talking about. For me, I’ve been stuck on the painting of my best friend, as well as a couple of others. But months were going by and I wasn’t finishing anything. I felt like I was running in circles (Ha…another recurring theme for me.)

But once I finished the one of my best friend, I could feel the juices flowing again. And oh boy, today, I think I’ve hit my stride.

I think a lot of artists give up when they hit that creative drought. It can seem so long and pointless, and we worry that our creativity will never come back again. Patience is the key – I like to think of it as a long, uphill plateau – you’re still going up, but from where you’re standing, everything looks flat. For me, it feels like a resting place, where I can recuperate, and re-energize, and build up my creative resources again.

Of course, that doesn’t mean I don’t get frustrated and angry – I definitely do, because you can only rest for so long before the urge to run again returns. Unfortunately, you can’t force it. It’s something that happens naturally. And I’ve found that consistently after a drought, my creativity improves dramatically. It’s like I come to a tall cliff, and because I’ve been resting, I can climb it full tilt. Like a lot of things, creativity is cyclical, and both sides of the circle are equally important, even if one of them drives us nuts.

Sometimes though, that push you need to get to the end of the plateau is a voice of encouragement and I got that yesterday.

George is an older, local, professional artist with a helluva lot of experience under his belt. For some reason I can’t fathom but I’m also not going to question, he’s taken me under his wing and goes out of his way to help me out and show me the ropes. I am ridiculously grateful to him, and learn more from talking to him for 30 minutes than I do on the internet in 4 hours. He gives practical, realistic advice, but he also gives me something more – he respects my work and my style for what it is, and never tries to change it. He offers advice on improvements and techniques and things like stretching your own canvas, but he understands that I paint the way I paint, and knows that I’m the only person who can teach me more about my way of painting.

He also offers encouragement, in a way that makes me want to run back to my easel and start painting without feeling like I need to brush off all that cheesiness. You know what some encouragement is like – “You’re just wonderful. The world wants you to shine, Sarah! Just shine!” Ick.

While this might work for some people, I usually just want to go take a shower after.

With George, he just tells me to stick with it and to keep hacking away and that my work shows something extraordinary that he doesn’t often see (blush) and that my best bet is to go into my room, say to myself, “Alright, this is what I want to do, now lets get damned good at it” and to work away.

Phrases like that are like lighting a fire under me – it awakens that drive and ambition that can sometimes fall latent during a dry spell. I got home and all I wanted to do was paint and paint and paint. I started 2 new paintings with ideas for more tumbling out. I’m looking at other paintings, auction house books, Old Master books, studying, learning, absorbing, with the goal of creating the best work that I possibly can. Its a heady feeling, and one that I missed.

So you’ll be seeing lots of work in progress photos up here as I try to keep track of all of the ideas in my head.

Ooooh, its so exciting. These are the times I live for.

November 26, 2008 at 9:27 am 3 comments

I fell for the starving artist myth, hook, line and sinker.

I have a weird problem. It’s not even a problem really. I don’t know what I’d call it. Let me attempt to explain.

I can find opportunities galore. I don’t know why, but I just have to breathe and I get opportunities, especially related to my art. I make friends easily, and I have this rather large support system of people whom I respect and admire and who support my dreams and goals.

First off, let’s just say – how absolutely amazing is that? I am completely and totally blessed that these people are in my life. I don’t know what I did to deserve them, but it just rocks my socks that these people support me and are willing to go completely out of their way to help me out. How wonderfully awesome is that? I still can’t even believe it.

So yeah, opportunities and marvelously supportive people just seem to flow into my life, and this makes me so insanely happy.

Here’s my problem – I can never seem to monetize that. And I don’t mean that in an icky, dirty way, like how can I make money off of all these people who support me. Oh no. I don’t mean that at all.

What I mean is, with all of these opportunities that come my way, I can never quite seem to turn them into cash. It’s like I have this gigantic mental block between me and the money. (Probably pretty similar to the one between me and my ambition…food for thought I think?)

I think that a lot of artists have money blocks. Ever read the Artist’s Way? Julia Cameron goes into a lot of detail about that, and rightly so. As artists, we automatically buy into the stereotype that all artist’s are starving artists, and that’s “just the way things are.”

But what if it wasn’t?

What if our attitude towards money and art directly impacted how much money we make? What if we weren’t convinced that making money from our art would be selling out? I’m not proposing here that if we all just thought differently, we’d become millionaires. That’s a little far fetched. But what about thousand-aires? What about, making enough money on the side doing our art that we can afford to buy ourselves those little luxuries, those vacations, that beautiful easel?

What if your attitude towards money changed, and instead of thinking that it’s impossible to get, that its easy to get? Or at least easier than impossible. How would that change things?

Because the way you think about something directly impacts what you do about it. If you’ve already decided that money is impossible to make from art and that selling your art means selling out and that starving is “just the way its supposed to be”, what do you think the odds are that you’re going to be out there, meeting the right people and trying for the right opportunities? What do you think the odds are that you’re going to even notice that those opportunities are there?

They certainly aren’t odds that I’d be betting on.

And I’m not trying to judge here – I fall into this way of thinking a lot of the time all the time. But I notice that it’s definitely a trend for me – if I’m focused on what I can do, and the opportunities that are out there, and develop a money consciousness, I make more money. I sell things. I get opportunities. But if I’m focused on how hard it is, and how much it sucks, and how I’m busting my butt and nothing is ever gonna work out…well all of my good stuff just dissipates. It’s kind of a self fulfilling prophecy.

You can do what you think you can do. Nothing more, nothing less.

I often think that I can’t make a lot of money at art, or ever be successful. I often feel like I’m failing. My results reflect that a whole helluva lot. It’s obviously not something that you can change overnight. But I believe that attitude and mindset are 90% of the battle. If you can change those things, then you can probably change your whole life.

It’s definitely a work in progress though.

Thoughts?

November 24, 2008 at 2:43 pm 6 comments

Positivity Fridays: A New Tradition! (Because I just complain too much.)

Welcome to the first ever edition of Positivity Fridays.

I realized last night that I spend far too much time complaining on this blog, and being negative and feeling stuck. Which is all well and good, because that’s just where I am right now. But I’m never going to get out of that, unless I start talking about the good bits of my week. This is where I’m going to give myself a pat on the back for what I’ve accomplished, or finished, or even just come to terms with. Maybe even breakthroughs that I’m making. This way, I’ll always end my week on a positive note, and it’ll force me to give myself a little more credit than I do right now.

(I totally stole and bastardized this idea from Havi Brook’s FluentSelf.com Friday Check-In. Hopefully, she’ll forgive me.)

Alright, let’s get started!

Awesome Thing #1: I finished the painting from hell. Boy, did that feel good. And I’m super happy with the finished product, which is also a good thing.

I also finished another painting this week, Denbigh Castle, which was another stuck painting for me. Another artist had told me a while ago that it was too boring and needed more bushes and stuff in it, and showed me a sketch of how it should look, except it was nothing like what I’d envisioned in my head (I was trying to go for a minimalist landscape), and so I had this total self esteem break down for a while, where I thought that maybe the whole painting was just crap.

But go me! I got over that, and I’ve finished it, and I’m happy with it. I don’t think its boring, but maybe you do. I think its peaceful, and tranquil. But that’s just my take on it. You can think what you want.

Denbigh Castle by Sarah Marie Lacy

Awesome Thing #2: I finally saw Chris Cornell in concert. You don’t even understand how awesome and mindbogglingly cool that was.  I’ve been waiting 18 months to go see him (the first time he came anywhere near here since I fell in love with his voice and subsequently my boyfriend, it was a 19+ event. And I was 18. God I’m young.)

I was terrified I was going to repeat the pattern of my father and Jimi Hendrix, and he was going to die before I could see him live. Fortunately, he managed to not follow in the footsteps of many a rock star before him, is still alive and breathing, and singing like a freaking maniac. Oh my god, I thought I was going to die when he stepped on stage. And it was all intimate, and standing only, and so I was like 20 feet from the stage, directly in front of the mic. Plus, this concert was populated by incredibly short people. I’m no giant, but my 5’7″ height towered over them, so I had no problem seeing. Yeeah.

Awesome Thing #3: I actually set some goals this week. Modest ones, yes, but I actually did it, so for me, that equals BIG STEP. Because I’ve got all this stuff coming up, like “Oh my god, what if I fail? Then everyone will know, and they’ll all hate me and think I’m stupid and disgusting, and laugh me off the internet.”

But despite all this stuff, I set the goals anyways. So yeah. Go my team.

Awesome Thing #4: I got the last spot in a live painting event in Niagara Falls, which I am totally stoked about. It’s called the Total_Fusion Mind Funk Experience, and anything with a name that intense is obviously going to kick ass.

So what’ll happen is me, and about 11 other painters are going to paint and chill and there’s gonna be live music and some acting stuff, and a film crew broadcasting it live on the internet and food and booze, and its just going to be a swell time. So if you live in the Niagara Region and you’re reading this and you love me, you should probably just come. Even if you hate me, come anyway.

Awesome Thing #5: I thought I’d throw a fifth one in, because 5 is a nice, comfortable number. I’m weird okay?

This one isn’t so much a “good thing” per say. It’s more like a “Wow, I totally just realized this and its something that I should kind of work through” thing.

So I’ve got huge, HUGE, blocks about success. We all knew that. But I realized that even more specifically (and this kind of goes along with the whole “goal setting is scary” deal), I have blocks surrounding my vision of success. I don’t really know what success means to me.

I’ve been reading “Think and Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill, and its what got me thinking. His first chapter is all about having a burning desire for success. And I realized that, I don’t have that.

And it’s not ’cause I don’t want to succeed. I do. It’s almost like there’s this big wall between me, and my desire to succeed. Like a big wall between me and my ambition. I used to be a very ambitious kid, particularly before I got sick. But since then, it’s kind of faded, and now its this washed up memory of yesterday, this thing I used to have and feel. But that burning spark is gone.

It’s probably got something to do with having a pretty sketchy self esteem, and not a very strong belief in my own abilities. But it’s definitely something that I’m going to explore, and maybe figure out exactly what it is that’s blocking me here.

And that’s it. I’m done.

That wasn’t so bad, right? It actually feels kind of good. I love new traditions.

Got something that happened in your week that you’re totally happy about? Leave me a comment and tell me about it!

Let’s all just celebrate the awesomeness.

Have a spiffy weekend!

November 21, 2008 at 10:11 am 4 comments

Don’t even bother reading this. It’s just me complaining for 803 words.

This morning, I have run out of patience with myself.

I am tired of hearing myself say I’m stuck. I don’t want to be stuck anymore. I don’t want to talk about being stuck anymore. I just want to be un-stuck. And for everything to be okay again.

This whole, “I feel like a frigging doormat” thing is getting old. I’m tired of it. I feel like I’m repeating myself, running in circles. But do I know how to stop? Umm…nope. Not at all.

So instead, I just feel like a raging failure. And as I write this, I’m curled up under a blanket, with a big cup of tea, sulking, and ashamed.

See, here’s the thing – I went to see Chris Cornell last night. Complete and total dream. But you know what I did? I kind of fucked up the whole night, because for some reason, I got it into my head that my boyfriend, Jesse, (who is a saint, and I don’t even understand how or why he puts up with my crap) – I got it into my head that maybe he didn’t love me as much that day. Ask me why? I don’t have a fucking clue. It happens a fair amount. I expect him to just wake up one day and hate me. Anyone wanna guess this has something to do with having been with a guy who did do that? Yeah, it probably does. But I’m tired of it affecting this relationship.

And I felt so ashamed for feeling like this, and for being so needy and doormat-ey, and ready to burst into tears at any moment, that I just wanted to run away and hide. And I still feel the same way this morning. But do you wanna know what’s really messed? I’m ashamed of being ashamed. I’m embarrassed that I’m ashamed and want to hide. It’s this big frigging vicious circle, and I’m stuck smack dab in the middle of it. I’m ashamed that I don’t know how to just fix my problems, and be okay. I’m ashamed that I don’t know how to just function like a normal human being.

Ohh, normal. How I long for you. Even though everyone always tells me that “normal” doesn’t exist. But until you’ve felt like you’re not normal, you will never get that, for you, “normal” does exist, because its this place where you don’t screw everything up.

It’s a place where you’re not left with questions like, how do you tell the person you love that you love them so much, you’re terrified of fucking things up?

And that you try so hard not to fuck things up, that you just end up fucking things up?

And that you don’t know how to just be with someone, without worrying if you’re saying the wrong thing, or asking for too much for yourself, or being too demanding, or less lovable, and you’re just trying so damn hard to be everything they’ve ever wanted.

And you feel like you have to prove to them that you’re a good person. You feel like you have to prove to them that you’re worth loving, even though, logically, you know that they just want you to relax, and just be you.

But you feel like “you” isn’t good enough. It couldn’t possibly be enough for someone to love. So you try and you try and you try, and you perform a series of complicated tricks, and maybe, just maybe, they’ll love you now.

Except they’ve always loved you. But because you don’t love you, how could they possibly love you? “You” was never enough for people in the past. They always wanted you to be someone else, to be something else.

Something that wasn’t you. Because “you” was never good enough. And I’m tired of hearing myself say that, like some old worn out excuse. “Oh well, the people I cared about in the past abandoned me, and made me feel like total crap about myself, and I felt like I had to perform for them, to be someone different to get them to love me and when I was just myself, I was made to feel like that would never be good enough.”

I want to dismiss how huge that is. Because I’m waiting for someone to turn around and tell me that its no big deal. That I’m blowing things out of proportion. That I’m crazy. And that being made to feel that way is so easy to get over, and wouldn’t affect anyone else the way its affecting me.

Because that’s usually what people tell me. That I’m just being ridiculous.

So I guess today, that’s what I’m doing. Just off, being ridiculous and overdramatic and silly.

I just wish being those things didn’t hurt so damn much.

Fuck, I need a hug.

November 20, 2008 at 11:06 am 1 comment

Ooh, I’m stuckity stuck stuck stuck.

If you’re gonna be stuck, you might as well make it into a weird rhyming thingy.

I am still feeling uncomfortable, and out of touch with my own identity. I constantly come back to the same pattern – feeling stuck, specifically in the mind of a 12 year old. I feel like I got benched during my teenage years, and now that I’m finally back in the game, I’m still playing like I’m 12, not 20.

Basically, this is how it goes:

I don’t want to annoy the “adults”. I know pretty much nothing. And I should probably just keep my head down, shut up and avoid saying anything too stupid or ignorant or naive.

And its getting to the point where feeling like this is not really so productive. And it’s driving me nuts. On the other hand, I’m not really sure how to go about playing catch up – I kind of missed a solid 8 years of teenage stupidity, and I don’t really want to take the next 8 years playing dumb teenager to get up to speed.

So I’m looking for a faster way to resolve this inner rift. And it really boils down to a confidence issue – I have very little faith in my own abilities and have trouble seeing myself as I actually am.

Kal, from Originaly Purity, left me this comment on my last post…

“I have only known you…my word less than a month and I can see so much in you…I find it so strange that you cannot see it yourself […]There is magic inside of you and you share it through your art and your smile.

He’s pretty much nailed it. I literally cannot see these things in myself. I’m still stuck being 12. And 8 years of feeling incompetent and incapable has left its mark as well. My sense of self, and my trust in my self has been shattered. It’s definitely better than it has been, thanks to wonderful friends like Kal and my boyfriend,  and sites like FluentSelf.com; I feel more intact than I have in a long time.

But I’m not over that hump yet. I still feel stuck. And it’s the most intensely frustrating feeling, ever. Ever. And I’m getting to the point where I’m like, “Okay! Enough already! I just want to feel competent now!” I realize that it doesn’t happen overnight. I have to work on believing in myself.

But goddammit, does it have to be such a pain in the ass?

P.S. I finally have a name for my CFS coaching business! The CFS Ninja. Oh yeaah. We’re gonna go all ninja on that CFS. Just watch me.

November 19, 2008 at 11:23 am 1 comment

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